Dear Mom,

Happy Birthday! My heart is filled to overflowing with gratitude that we get to share this birthday together. There was a time, not so long ago, that we weren’t sure we were going to get this birthday. But, by God’s grace and in His most perfect plan, here we are…together like we have been from the start.

It’s difficult for me to put into words all that I feel as I celebrate you today. Life is a crazy thing, I think we all thought that last year would be one of the hardest birthdays of your life, but as it so often does, life proved us wrong. Go figure. After losing dad so suddenly, we were aware of how precious life is, but this year we truly know it don’t we? In the last 5 months we have learned to cherish each and every minute. While it would be easy to wish that you would have never gotten sick in the first place, I can’t easily dismiss the lessons we have learned that could only be taught in this situation. 

“…for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:11-13

In the midst of your own fight there has not been a moment where you stopped being there for me; comforting me, praying for me, and teaching me. Teaching me how to stand strong in the storm. From the very first time the “C” word was introduced into our lives your only response has been that you are going to fight…and fight you have. You’re fighting every single day. When the doctors came in for morning rounds the day of your first chemotherapy treatment you spoke with a quiet strength saying that you were going to fight and fight like hell to live. You’ve lived up to those words inspiring all of us. People that don’t even know you are moved by your strength and courage.

Some might think that fighting to live is the obvious choice, but we know that it’s not necessarily so. Life is hard enough as it is, but I have seen on such a personal level how brutal this fight is against this disease and its treatments. And even though we are crazy and broken you say that you draw strength for the fight by remembering what you’re fighting for. You’re fighting for us: your children and grandchildren. What an honor it is to be yours!

“She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue…Her children arise and call her blessed…” Proverbs 31:25-28

You have always been my pillar of strength and wisdom. Leading and guiding me through this bumpy road called life. And when it all gets to be too much, it is with you that I’ve laughed until it hurts. You are beauty and grace personified. Lately when you look in the mirror I know you see the effects of the last 5 months. When I look at you I can hardly describe the beauty that I see. You are my rock, my anchor, my very best friend. Life seems a little easier to handle when I get to live it with you.

I don’t know what the future hold for us, but per your encouragement and wisdom, we will continue to trust God; together for as long as He allows. I haven’t been around for that long and I haven’t had the chance yet to do a lot of things that I hope to be proud of someday, but whether I’m given the chance or not, one of my life’s proudest titles will always be the title of being yours. You’re so much that I hope to be when I “grow up”. Yours is a love that loves completely and is free of judgement. It’s the kind of love people spend lifetimes searching for but I was born into. It’s a love that sees me and knows me (and knows me 8 months longer than the rest of the world).

It is one of my life’s truest honors to walk alongside you as you walk the path that has been set before you. Since before I was born you carried me and it is my privilege to carry you in the moments that it gets to be too much. I will carry you always; never as a burden, always as an honor. I cannot thank God enough for choosing me to be yours to laugh with, to cry with, to be scared with, to talk for hours with etc.

Thank you for sharing yourself with me always.

Thank you for showing me Jesus.

Thank you for listening to me.

Thank you for teaching me.

And for so much more.

Oh, and this year there’s a new one…thank you for fighting.

Like every chapter before this, we will go into this next one side by side, hand in hand, together as long as He allows. Happy Birthday my mom, my heart, my best friend. I honor you and celebrate you today and always.

Fight on,

Leslie Danielle

P.S. I love you. I love you. I love you. Like the song 🙂